So, I guess there comes a point when we all have to grow up.

I feel so discouraged right now.

I have such a passion for people to know Christ. For them to know Him deeper and deeper each and every day - and thats what I want to spend my life doing.

I am 19 years old. I have not a clue of what I want to do with my life. I'm about to be a sophomore in college, and if I don't decide now, I'm wasting a ton of money.

Do I stick with bible, and have nothing to do with it when I graduate?
Do I do Interdiciplinary, and have 3 minors for one major.. with Bible, Childrens Ministry/Applied Ministry, and Early Childhood Education?
Do I major in Elementary Education, have no electives and pay alot of money to get the same paycheck and education as a state school?
or do I transfer?

I hate feeling like I have to decide. I think it would be great to be an elementary teacher... but I can get that with any 4 year degree.

These are my constant thoughts. just thought i would let you know.

Joy of the Lord!

What an amazing thing. I have been in the worst mood lately. I wasn't getting enough sleep, I felt extremely left out.. but last night in James' message, I re-learned who the Lord was. The Creator of the universe. What a joy that... our Creation must have had a creator.. and that creator is still around because he is powerful. And if He truly holds that power- He desires to have an intimate relationship with me.

JOY.

Because God is our creator. He makes us beautiful. And... that He is.

So. Remember today that the joy of the Lord is your strength - thankfully. Our Creator!!



LOVE YOU.

............... all i want is more than 15 minutes to type a blog and change my laundry out.. before curfew...

This weekend, we've been talking about reaching the nations... and how it's God's heartbeat.

I completley agree with this statement. Without reaching the nations, why would Jesus have really died on this cross? For what purpose? ... Every creature was made to glorify God. In every tongue and every nation.

I think sometimes, we are so anxious to reach... Africa, Asia, Eruope, South America, Canada... we completley skip out on a very dangerous and dying nation: America.

I know, I know, the 10-40 window has the majority of lost people in one section, and those people don't have any access to the gospel.

But, isn't that where we as americans are becoming dangerous?? We have complete access to the gospel. In every language. And we could probably pay someone to print words in a different font to make it more appealing....

So... why do we have the most dead christians here? Why are we living in a world of churches that are dying every day, and churches that are definatley not following the gospel... instead following their own agendas.

I don't write this because I'm bitter, I write because there is a definate need that we overlook every single day as we pray for the nations.

Not once this weekend did we sit back and pray for our government, our states, the lost here....


Next time you begin to think about God's heartbeat... remember America.

Maybe someday I will be free.. from these memories haunting me.

I found a love letter today
That you gave me for no reason at all
i read it for over an hour
and I can't throw it away

remember when you were amazed?
remember when this was so perfect?
remember when we lifted each other up?
remember when we drove for hours?

and one day, oh i know i'll be free
from all of these memories that pass me by
and one day, i know i'll be free...
from all of these memories you gave me.

you surprised me with flowers
on the worst day i've ever had.
you drove 20 miles across town
just to comfort me

remember when we were amazed?
remember when this was so real?
remember when we thought we found it?
remember how we wanted to spend every holiday with each other?
remember when we lived for the day..
together?


Sorry for the emo-ness, guys. I've been kinda down lately, listening to Dave Matthews and Stephen Speaks all day... haha...

I pray that one day a guy can sweep me off my feet. I have stuck to this floor for so long, and I'm ready to be pursued.

Jesus will bring Him. And He's going to be so amazing. And so much better than i've imagined.

home sweet home...

Well, on Monday I woke up with a sore throat. I didn't think much of it, but when I woke up Tuesday morning I was absolutley miserable. I stayed in bed all day long, and then my parents came and picked me up last night. I went to the doctor this morning, and they drew blood, and a strep test. I didn't have strep, but I have a high enough White Blood Cell count to need some anti-biotics and a shot. The PA looked at my ears, nose, and throat, and came to a conclusion that I was sick. Ha! Apparantly everything was swolen, and my mom says my face looks swolen.

I am so tired to do anything... I can only sleep or lay here and watch TV, it even hurts to hold my head up...

Please be praying for me.. I want to get back to the creek ASAP!
Love you all!